Young people’s expectations for marriage and reality of married life

Today gender roles of people have changed in the last few years as a result of the extension of women’s rights. And it has affected social and cultural life styles of between men and women. Those who are young imagine their marriage in terms of what chores are divided between marriage couples, how mates use leisure time and what they do, and how couples live independently from parents-in-law.
First, many young people have responsibilities of housework. Husbands and wives expect to share the housework fifty-fifty before marriage such as, cooking, laundry, vacuuming, throwing trash away, and cleaning bath room. If not only a married woman is working late at night, but also her working still doesn’t finish; furthermore, there are household; which may be not finished yet. She hopes that her husband does some housekeeping. But reality is contrary to expectation. Both of them procrastinate their housework because these days, there are lots of double-income families. They are tired enough and don’t have time to split housework precisely half and half. When they come back home after working, not only do they just want to sleep or take a rest for tomorrow, but also they cannot afford to do housework. And this phenomenon is increasing.
Second, many young people differ in their expectations to spend extra times or holidays. They want to spend time together, doing same hobbies or dating such as going travelling, going to the movies, and having dinner together in nice restaurant etc. that they did before they were married. They always think they will be of one mind and will not change their heart after marriage. However, reality is different. They find unknown facts about their partners that they don’t know or that they are not interested in. At first, they are pleased to know new truths about their spouses, but later, knowing new things about their husbands or wives can bring difference in opinion. And time goes by they are getting exhausted because marriage life is difficult in aspects of patience and taking care of not just yourself, but family. These devotions sometimes make them sick of being their family. And they don’t want to spend much time together with their partners. They start to do what they want. They like different hobbies more than matching hobbies to behave separately. Sometimes also they don’t want to spend time together when they get into the state of ennui in married life. For example, with some married couples, a husband don’t want to come back home early after working run on, he just gets drunk with friends or colleagues all night. And a wife enjoys buying whatever she wants. They release their stress, doing what they like.
Last, many young people suppose that they will live apart from their parents-in-law. Then, they think the relationship with them will be more at ease. There is no doubt that marriage couples are relationship with their parents. They wish to get comfortable and nice parents-in-law. These days, there are lots of nice, gentle parents-in-law. At first, the partner’s parents show them warm and kind image; in addition, they say that they just want couples to live together happily. On the other hand, after marriage, some parents-in-law change and interfere with their lifestyle such as eating habits after marriage. Parents come to couple’s house and say “don’t eat toasts and serials. You should eat it because it is not enough to work in the morning.” This interference makes young people uncomfortable, and the first image which was good will change, and their relationship can be just formal. Furthermore, they can also interfere with having children of couples. For example, they say impolitely “why don’t still you have children?” or “Maybe you need checkups for pregnancy.”
Expectation and reality is completely different like I mentioned already, so you need preparation for marriage. When you marry somebody, you should be careful and need efforts to overcome your marriage life wisely. I think before you marry, if you make agreements to maintain peace of family with a man who will be your spouse, it will be helpful to each partner in aspects of endurance.